iKON on Expectations: Which Member Are You?

Lasting Fourever requires managing expectations. Here's what their different relationships with pressure teach us.


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How do you handle expectations and pressure? Let’s see what the members of iKON think on how to keep going.

Image taken from Soompi

Yunhyeong: The One Who Release Expectations Entirely

“We’ve spoken multiple times about how we feel but if we make 100 predictions, all 100 times do not go as planned. That’s why I no longer have expectations or try to make predictions.”

This is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), the idea that psychological flexibility means holding outcomes loosely rather than gripping them tightly.

Yunhyeong isn’t saying he doesn’t care or that the outcome won’t impact how he feels. But he’s choosing to not let predictions run his emotional state and to release attachment to specific outcomes.

 

Bobby: The One Who Focuses on Effort to Minimise Regret

“If you continue to diligently do the homework you’re given and do what you have to do, you have less regret when it comes time to accept the results.”

This is growth mindset meets Regret Theory. Bobby thinks that he’ll regret inaction more than regretting trying and failing. He does his best in all that he does, where he control what he can (effort), and release what he can’t (results).


Jinhwan: The Natural Optimist

When his members were carefully managing their expectations, Jinhwan just laughed and said: “I’m different from my members. I feel good about this.”

Psychologists call this dispositional optimism, a measurable personality trait linked to lower anxiety, better physical health, and stronger resilience. While it’s largely an intrinsic trait, you can cultivate it by actively challenging negative thought patterns.

 

Donghyuk: The One Who Needed an Outside Perspective

“Recently, I shared a meal with someone who’s like my ‘life’s senior’ and talked about my concerns. They told me, ‘Why are you trying to turn the world upside down and only do well? You guys have worked hard and people already know that you guys do well. So don’t get hung up on that and promote enjoyably, without regret.’ With those words, I was able to let go of my stress and worries.”

This is the mental health power of mentorship, what psychologists call cognitive reappraisal through social learning. Sometimes the anxiety is too much, and you need someone with distance and perspective to provide different interpretation of your situation.

Learning from others and asking advice are not weaknesses, as there is strength in knowing when you’ve exhausted your own perspective and need someone else’s.

 

Image taken from Instagram: @withikonic

Who do you relate to more? And is there any mindset you want to take on?

None of these is the “right” way. They’re just different relationships with the same universal human experience: wanting things to go well and not knowing if they will.

The healthiest thing isn’t to pick the “best” coping style. It’s to know which one is yours, and to recognize when you need to borrow someone else’s.

Image taken from Instagram: @withikonic

Read more here:

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BTS, SWIM, to find our own rhythm in the deep

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